Process

So this time I jumped. I spoke to the stars. I usually tilt my head up and quietly converse with the cosmos and sometimes stumble in my path (this one time I almost fell, but I clasped your arm instinctively and tightly which kept me from actually stumbling on the shore).

Years ago, I spoke to the stars to consume me. And it has finally befallen during our collision, “Consume me”. Someone consumed me. And I consumed in return.

You send me out at midnight to dip my soul into the sea. It is calm, fleeting, and magical. In the afternoon, you brave the strong rain with us, with me, and we laugh at the lightning ready to kill us any moment of that passing, wild storm. It is difficult to open the eyes with this storm. I feel the cold, sharp, heavy drops on my face. Another afternoon, I ask you how to dive deep down. You show me. You wait for me to do it, I wait for me to abandon my self and I do it.

You call my name several times. Coming from the waterfalls, we return. In the middle of the forest, the others are far from sight. That afternoon, when I was barefoot and my hair still wet from the rain and the seawater, you kiss me. That morning before you first left, when we were alone in the room after I brushed my teeth, you kiss me. You teach me to close my eyes. It is easy to close my eyes and feel your lips. That unknown time after midnight, under the blanket of the Milky Way, after sitting on the black sand and talking about magic and pointing at shooting stars, we retire for the night, you call my name and kiss me. Then I hug you so sudden, I hear you say my hair is on your mouth, because I was so touched because I don’t know really. It happened. Then I hold your hand, briefly, then you save me from stumbling.

You hold and caress my hand, always, before you leave.

I want you tonight and bare me until I’m the bravest person under the night sky, for all seasons. You are my lover in this revolution of the Sun. And I choose to engage with you now, in a connection only the two of us can create. To explore you, today I make a choice. Collide and collapse into me.